SP16
Today marks the end of spring quarter! A huge weight was lifted off my shoulders, walking out of Solis Hall. Coming into my DOC 3 final, I thought to myself, "You're finally done with DOC! You're finally done with your classes! You can finally go home!" Not only does today mark the end of spring quarter, today marks the end of my first year of college.
Spring quarter was definitely the time of my freshmxn year where I found myself connecting more to my peers. This quarter made me realize how amazing the communities I have here in San Diego are. Coming into college, I had a huge fear that I would not feel a sense of belonging on campus. I felt naive, small, and anxious on this huge, intimidating university. I was wrong.
This quarter has brought me self-fulfillment. That little goal I had the beginning of the year was met.
I realized that although UCSD may have its flaws and shortcomings as a university, it offers a space that I can call mine: Kaibigang Pilipin@. There is a quote that one of my great Kuyas have once said:
"Community building is messy, dirty, and hard,
BUT THAT'S WHERE YOU FIND THE BEAUTY."
I can resonate with this quote. It took me a while to feel comfortable coming out to the space. Looking back, I am very glad I took the time to get to know kuyates and my fellow classmates-- the thirst years.
I honestly did not think I would find a place where I would fully immerse myself in. I remember back in high school, thinking "the view from the top" was big. However, I am here on a college campus. A world-renowned institution of learning. A place where research for the future is constantly going on 365 days of the year.
Now I find myself giving back to the space that has retained me the most. For my second year, I will be serving my favorite community as Kaibigang Pilipin@'s Activities Coordinator. My goal is to help continue foster a welcoming, nourishing space for future GBMers, kuyates, and adings to enjoy. Kaibigang Pilipin@ has offered so much for me my first year, especially this quarter.
Pilipin@ Cultural Celebration (PCC) is definitely a production I find myself going back to throughout the rest of my college years.
KAAMPing is a weekend I will look forward to every year.
I have never felt so much love within a space. I have never felt so welcomed. Staying home for the summer will be difficult since all the people I enjoy being around will be far away. Kaibigang Pilipin@ brings so much joy to my life and I can't wait to continue to build a stronger community within the space.
VIP, YOU ALL RETAIN THE HECK OUT OF ME.
THIRST YEARS, WE ARE GOING TO BE GR9 KUYATES.
(JEJE) BOARD, WE ARE GOING TO DO WERK NEXT YEAR.
Not only does KP retain me, the girls of my Q3 suite do too. I remember move-in like it was yesterday. The summer before college, I created our suite group chat. Scared and confused, I thought I'd end up with boring creeps. Again, I was wrong.
From the first conversation as a group to our last picture for the school year, Q3 girls have been the greatest suitemates I can ask for (or, daughters. since i'm Mama Kay, hehe). We instantly clicked the first night we moved in. I remember being scared the night of move in because I found myself walking to the cliffs with these complete strangers. I am so glad that I was down to go out that night because that was the beginning of my trust towards these girls. From sorority recruitment to staying up late to talk about life, K-Pop, Star Wars, and Tinder matches, I have found peace and solitude in this small, dorm suite. I would like to thank them for dealing with my overprotective, neat freak self. I will never forget the bible studies, the "raves", the movie marathons, the Goody's runs, and the times they had my back when I threw kickbacks in our common area (WOW I'M SO SLICK!!!). I really hope Meow Meow House will work out because I can't wait to continue this college journey with them. I can already imagine the Wine Wednesdays, homemade dinners, and sleepless nights to come.
I never really thought I'd see myself in a sorority. Yeah, you guessed it. I was wrong.
Being in TriDelta has taught me that there will always be a sister there for me. Although I found myself gravitating more towards KP this quarter, my sisters were always there to brighten my day. They always supported and motivated me. Greek women are often viewed negatively in society due to the way they are portrayed in television and film. Joining Panhellenic Council here in San Diego has taught me that being a "sorority girl" has a completely different meaning and purpose. Being "srat" means to be a strong, intelligent leader. My sisters are the sweetest. They are the most selfless individuals I have ever met. I hope to embody these traits as a I grow as a collegiate woman. I can't wait to see what else this sisterhood has in store for me.
Abigail Lara, if you're reading this, your little misses you. I'm so proud of you for studying abroad this quarter. I can't wait to hear all your crazy stories. COME BACK TO ME ALREADY!!!
This year involved a lot of personal growth. Another fear I had coming into college was failing to be independent. I was scared I would be too childish for college. Of course, I was wrong.
I suck at cooking. I suck at folding clothes. I suck at saving money. I suck at waking up on time.
However, that is okay.
I've learned that it is okay not to know how to be an adult.
It's okay to FaceTime your mom too often.
It's okay to be a slob.
It's okay to fuck up.
I've learned that college is full of crazy kids trying to get degrees. We stay up until sunrise doing foolish, stupid things. We go out in the middle of the night to dance on the streets. We spend all our money on clothes, concerts, and food. We find ourselves putting all our school work aside to hang out with our friends.
That is okay.
College is the time to explore new things. It is the time to be clueless, selfless, reckless. It is the time to live on the wild side. It is normal to fuck up because all you have to do is get back up and werk even harder.
Looking back at the year, I have changed. From this confused little girl to this woke, growing baddie, haha!
I am so proud.
I am so proud of all I've accomplished this year.
I have found the true major for me. I dyed my hair. I probably maxed my credit card one, two many times. I got on academic probation. I I stayed up until 5am, watching YouTube videos. I turned the heck up.
I lived.
I continue to pray for great days. I continue to thank God for this amazing opportunity being here. I continue to appreciate how great this year was for me.
Lastly, I am proud to go home and say,
I LOVE COLLEGE.
See y'all in the Fall. :-)
Sincerely, Kaithleen
P.S: SHOUT OUT TO THE MARSHALL COFFEE WINDOW. Y'ALL THE REAL MVPs. I HAVE LEARNED THAT I LOVE COFFEE AND I WILL CONTINUE TO DRINK IT. FOREVER 5'1.